A Pakistani wedding unfolds over several events rather than a single day, and the names, mayun, mehndi, baraat, nikkah, walima, can make it feel like a ceremony you'll accidentally get wrong. You won't. The events are welcoming, colourful, and each one is simpler than its name sounds.
Here's the order, and what a guest needs to know for each.
Mayun and mehndi: the pre-wedding nights
The mayun is a small, family gathering in the days before the wedding, where the bride is dressed in yellow and close family sing and celebrate. The mehndi is the larger, more colourful evening of henna, music and dance, often the most relaxed event of the whole wedding. Guests wear bright colours, and women may have henna applied.
The baraat and the nikkah
On the wedding day the groom arrives in a procession called the baraat, traditionally on a decorated horse or car, greeted by the bride's family. Then comes the nikkah, the marriage contract, where the couple's consent is given, the mahr is confirmed and the contract is signed in front of witnesses.
The nikkah is the formal heart of the wedding, and the one event where guests are asked to dress and behave most modestly.
The walima: the reception
The walima is the banquet hosted by the groom's family after the marriage, the largest and most public of the events. This is where most guests give their gift, usually cash in an envelope or card, and where the couple are formally presented as married.
What to wear
Dress modestly and formally. For the mehndi, bright colours are welcome. For the nikkah, more sober and modest dress is right, and women may be asked to cover their heads. For the walima, formal wear, with the couple's own guidance the best guide of all. Alcohol is not served at any of the events.
What to give
Cash is the norm, given at the walima in an envelope or card, and the amount follows the relationship in the usual way. Close family give jewellery or gold, and if the couple have set up a registry or cash fund, use it. One gift for the wedding is enough, you don't need one for each event.